Tip 5 - Defifliffons 1
There are many methods to spend ya fliff. In the previous Case Studies of Fliffing I have referred to many of these methods without providing an adequate defifliffon. I was writing for full time fliffers born with my gift but I guess I have to dumb it down for you chumps so here it is.
Dump fistfuls:
Reach inside ya fliff sack and start dumping fistfuls of fliff over the counter. For extra points, cock ya head back and laugh violently while dumping.
Bomb it:
Fucking drop ya whole sack on the counter
Napalming:
This is an advanced move but one of my Favourites. Do the "Bomb It" motion but with more force and at an angle. Your entire fliff sack should break open and fliff should explode and pour all over the counter. This method is best saved for moments where you have been Questioned, potentially Outfliffed or a fly Panther is clocking in behind the counter. One you can practice which I use all the time is called the hollywood, cos you act in it. After the store person asks for the fliff, start looking sad, this is called acting. The store person and errbody in the line behind will start to believe you don't have the fliff to buy the goods. After a few seconds, the store person will start to say something. This is the way it will go down. You'll see them breath in, wait, they'll begin to form a word, and FUCKING BAAAAAAAAAAM!
BAAAMMM CCSSHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Fliff just fucking Explodes in their face! Receipts and coins fucking fly everywhere, Napalming the desk, the floor, even knocking Shit off the counter.
Before they knows what the Fuck just happened you've already busted a 180.
Waterfall:
Grab a fist full of fliff, look the person in the eye, straighten your arm out high in front of you, keep eye contact, start letting the fliff flow. Not too quick, just one at a time spreading all over the counter. As the fliff flows make your stare progressively more and more intense. An intensifying stare with a slight tilt of the head is very effective. Never break eye contact.
Use this shit in Scrabble.
Keep on fliffin
There are many methods to spend ya fliff. In the previous Case Studies of Fliffing I have referred to many of these methods without providing an adequate defifliffon. I was writing for full time fliffers born with my gift but I guess I have to dumb it down for you chumps so here it is.
Dump fistfuls:
Reach inside ya fliff sack and start dumping fistfuls of fliff over the counter. For extra points, cock ya head back and laugh violently while dumping.
Bomb it:
Fucking drop ya whole sack on the counter
Napalming:
This is an advanced move but one of my Favourites. Do the "Bomb It" motion but with more force and at an angle. Your entire fliff sack should break open and fliff should explode and pour all over the counter. This method is best saved for moments where you have been Questioned, potentially Outfliffed or a fly Panther is clocking in behind the counter. One you can practice which I use all the time is called the hollywood, cos you act in it. After the store person asks for the fliff, start looking sad, this is called acting. The store person and errbody in the line behind will start to believe you don't have the fliff to buy the goods. After a few seconds, the store person will start to say something. This is the way it will go down. You'll see them breath in, wait, they'll begin to form a word, and FUCKING BAAAAAAAAAAM!
BAAAMMM CCSSHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Fliff just fucking Explodes in their face! Receipts and coins fucking fly everywhere, Napalming the desk, the floor, even knocking Shit off the counter.
Before they knows what the Fuck just happened you've already busted a 180.
Waterfall:
Grab a fist full of fliff, look the person in the eye, straighten your arm out high in front of you, keep eye contact, start letting the fliff flow. Not too quick, just one at a time spreading all over the counter. As the fliff flows make your stare progressively more and more intense. An intensifying stare with a slight tilt of the head is very effective. Never break eye contact.
Use this shit in Scrabble.
Keep on fliffin
No comments:
Post a Comment